Framework Thinking | Influencing Others without Authority

​When it comes to influencing others, it's important to recognize that the person we are communicating with is more concerned about the usefulness of our words rather than simply what we say. Their focus lies in whether we are considering their needs and interests rather than expecting perfection in our proposed plans.

Therefore, influencing others should start with attentive listening and understanding. Listening can be broken down into four levels: curiosity, understanding, empathy, evaluation, and suggestion. Curiosity involves displaying a genuine interest in the other person's perspective. Understanding entails grasping the reasoning and judgment behind their thoughts. Likewise, empathy allows us to connect with and resonate with their emotions. Lastly, evaluation and suggestions enable us to fully comprehend their challenges and propose appropriate solutions.

These four levels of listening are interconnected and should be executed progressively, one step at a time. Curiosity is vital as it lays the foundation for fully understanding the other person's point of view. Without understanding, we cannot accurately grasp their emotions and logic. Empathy is essential for gaining their recognition, and offering suggestions without their approval beforehand can lead to their arrogance and unwarranted interference.​

By following these listening steps in a sequential manner, we can foster effective communication and successfully influence others.