Us by Terrence Real (2008)

To form a lasting, loving relationship, we need to learn how to fight well." - ​Terrence Real

​The book "Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship" by Terrence Real delves into couples' challenges and offers practical strategies to navigate them. It suggests we stop thinking in terms of “I” – and reframe our relationship in terms of “us.” This requires letting go of our egos and thinking about eco – as in the ecology of their relationship.

The practical action is to practice mindfulness to regularly observe our sensations, thoughts, and feelings without judgment. Relational mindfulness extends that neutral observation to your relationship with others.​

• Why we have egos? Ego plays a role in identity formation and the sense of individuality. It encompasses one's beliefs, values, memories, and self-perceptions, contributing to a person's sense of uniqueness and distinctiveness.
• How to cultivate eco mindset? cultivating an eco mindset in relationship building is a collaborative effort.

Relationship building needs fostering empathy, and cultivating mutual respect and understanding,